Non Donor Conceived (DC) offspring of Donors (also called Raised offspring) are the offspring of donors whom the donor raised, NOT the donor’s donor conceived offspring.

Non DC offspring are impacted by historical donor conception practices when they unexpectedly find out that they have donor conceived half siblings and can often be part of huge sibling pods.

Please keep in mind that if you are a Non DC offspring then you had the privilege of being raised by both of your biological parents. Your donor conceived siblings will not have had this privilege. Please be aware that for your DC siblings, there may be trauma implications around this.

Support Available for Non DC Offspring

• If you are a Non DC offspring and your DC siblings were conceived pre 1991, you are entitled to two free consulting via the DCR. This is because the Non DC offspring is impacted by historical donor conception practices.

• All Non DC offspring can join Donor Conceived UK community via our private Facebook group. Please email us at Info@DonorConceivedUK.org.uk for further details.

• If you would like to have contact with other Non DC offspring that you are not related too, please email us at Info@DonorConceivedUK.org.uk.

• If you are a Non DC offspring please be careful of alluding to the “generous man” idiom. This may be true in the case of your biological parent (the donor), but it depends on each individual case and attitudes to fertility industry. For example, fertility fraud/not fraud; fertility industry targeting immature/naïve students without considering long term consequences; donors creating children into family settings where mental/physical environment might not be ideal, etc.

Potential Questions for your Non DC sibling

Below are some of the questions that you could ask your Non DC sibling:

• Medical history, especially wider family.

• Does the non DC sibling have existing contact with other DC or are you the first?

• Did the non DC or donor do a DNA test or were they found through commercial DNA “trees”?

• What do you want out of relationship?

• Do you have siblings – same or different donor? Do they have non DC siblings ? What are their attitudes?

• Is the donor’s spouse still alive? Do they know?

• You could Suggest you both bring photos over the years of yourselves. They may or may not offer to bring photos of donor over the years too.

• Pen portrait of both of you – experiences over the years.

• Finding out about coincidences and shared interest/tastes amuse and help form bond

Things to keep in mind when meeting your Non DC Sibling for the first time

• Take it gently. It is a truism that family relationships are heart of what it is to be human but fertility practice industrially up-ends them.

• Forgive each other for starring at each other during the meeting.

• First date is a good analogy in terms of questions/pace but equally- might help for both of you to take your partners. Attraction is apparently not unknown!

• Keep in mind that even though there is no shared history, unlike most sibling relationships, there can often be an intense feeling of bond.

Huge thanks to one of the Non DC Siblings in our community who helped to put this post together.